I get made fun of on Facebook because I post about being happy and how fantastic being in love is. I don't get it. If I was miserable would more people commiserate with me and not be so negative? I know I haven't had the worst life, but I haven't had the easiest either. I'm finally happy, proud of who I am and what I've done...why can't I share that without people commenting in the negative?
I just laugh when they say oh I'm just kidding or whatever but honestly, I've stood by and watched others be happy for 30 years...it's my turn to be happy, why can't I express it? Anyways, it's probably a waste of time to get upset about it, but I do.
I have started school again. Tomorrow is my last day of week 2 and I have survived so far. Although this English class may be the death of a decent GPA for me. We are writing one essay a week (give or take)...I think that's 8 more essays. We turn in our first one Wednesday (because Monday is a holiday) and I'm a little nervous. So far we've only done one introduction essay and she marked it up pretty good with comma's, but didn't really make comments as to my content. Maybe because she couldn't really dispute that I'm a mom of 4 kids and live a busy, hectic life? I had to stop myself from writing lol or haha in my essay. I'm not the oldest person in either of my classes by quite a bit, which was a concern for me going in. I think I'll do ok this term. I plan on going Spring and Summer but we'll see how business is for our biz and my real estate. I don't have a time limit on when I have to have a degree by, but I don't want years to go between classes and forget what I learned either.
I'm really enjoying it though I am so busy I sometimes don't know if I'm coming or going, it's a great experience and I'm proud of myself for doing it. Three years ago this would have been a major panic attack invoking type of thing to do...
I re-joined Weight Watchers again. I know it works, I just have to do it. I can't do it on my own or I wouldn't keep gaining the weight back. I'm grateful for a husband that encourages me when I need it both by suggesting/cooking healthy options and commenting when he notices a loss as well as that he loves me the way I am, even if I don't lose. Haha, in fact, this is how much he loves me: the other night I asked him if he would be willing to eat 1 new WW meal that I prepare from a recipe off the website or in the magazine. He just looked at me for a few minutes and then said begrudgingly, "I guess I could do that once a week or two..." TRUE LOVE! Anyways, my first official weigh-in (WI from here on out) was a loss of 3.6lbs. I was on cloud 9 of course!
Saturday Jeremey and I had a talk about my priorities as far as school and work and family. I have a lot on my plate and he wanted to see where I was with everything. I have real estate clients but I don't feel like I can pursue them like I want to because I have no where to work (and a couple other things). He said he would solve that for me. We have a nice kerosene heater at our house and he is going to set up what will eventually be our bedroom into an office for me with printer etc so I can go over there, turn on the heater, and work as long as I need. The only thing I'll be missing is a toilet and since I'm doing my best to drink 64 oz of water a day, I will probably have to take breaks and run up to Grandma's house, 2 blocks up the street.
I don't know that I've ever had so many balls in the air at one time and yet been so content and happy with where I was in life. I've been reading my devotional and sometimes I find a point or scripture that applies to all aspects of life, including weight loss. Tonight I read Romans 8:9-11 NKJV But you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. Now if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he is not His. 10 And if Christ is in you, the body is dead because of sin, but the Spirit is life because of righteousness. 11 But if the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, He who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through His Spirit who dwells in you. As my devotional pointed out, Sin needs never to control us again. Gluttony is sin. plain and simple. It is true there are worse things to be addicted to, but if we are addicted to something, we are slave to whatever it is. Because of Jesus Christ's sacrifice, we were set free and that isn't just for smoking, drugs, alcohol or sex, but food and anything we have allowed to control us at any time.
Somedays the ultimate theme of my prayers will be for God to take the temptation of whatever food is calling my name but I pray as I strive to become more like Him, food will be for nourishment of my body, not to punish it.
